ellen degeneres here and now transcript

Ellen Degeneres: (03:42) They are. They are on the beat and Iwas like: Oh my God, thats crazy. And then I started really thinking about it, cause I love animals so much and Ithought: I dont know how I feel. Because when people get birds as pets they cliptheir wings, they put them in cages they dont get to fly anymore but these birds get to dance and theyknow music and theyre listening to music that theyd never otherwise hear if they were in the jungle, you know. Calculate how much it costs to transcribe, caption, or subtitle your content. Girl, you looks good, wont you back that ass up Ellen Degeneres: (06:15) If I have to do that, thatll be good. Youre 21 and youve already accomplished more than I had at that age. 05:07. [crowd laughs] [claps] If I have to do that, thats good. He was 40. Is there a special chicken that youd like to give a shout out to? She had a gawky, tomboyish persona, but her fans seemed to have no trouble seeing. And I looked at the bird and I said: Dont leave, youre safe in here. And the bird looked at me and said: I dont belong in here. And flew out. It does get better. Ill do that, thank you. Im laying on the sofa, I have my phone. Directors Joel Gallen Starring Ellen DeGeneres Genres Comedy, Arts, Entertainment, and Culture Subtitles English [CC] Audio languages English Theres a teacher I want to give a special shout out to. Build with the best speech-to-text APIs around. Yeah, I really do. [crowd cheers] [claps], That was before I got my new voice. If you put your money where your mouth is, you might end up swallowing a penny. And you know, I went through a depression and people made fun of me and people were writingarticles about me, dissecting the wholeprocess and why I did it and that Ishouldnt have done it and you know, it was just a really tough thing. I dont know. There are going to be bad times in life, like whats happening right now. Something different gonna happen in here? Speech-to-Text live streaming for live captions, powered by the worlds leading speech recognition API. [claps] Portia and I took a picture and this guy photobombed us back there. Squirrels live in trees. [message received noise] [crowd laughs] I send her this. I thought so, I thought [crowd laughs] Theres nothing more embarrassing than when you pass up a slow driver to showthem the proper way of driving. Wait, its a sock. Yep, you could get that for sure. No, thats not what you do. Yep. [claps] When we try on shoes theres a little tiny mirror on the ground. Parmesan where my accountant lives I didnt know it was her cause she wasin a different car. These cookies will be stored in your browser only with your consent. Call me Big Daddy when you back that ass up With tear-stained cheeks, Ellen DeGeneres signed off her chatshow for the final time on Thursday, ending a daytime TV juggernaut that had lasted 19 years. It is." 06 of 10. Try Rev and save time transcribing, captioning, and subtitling. - Oh, and a Diet Coke." Ellen DeGeneres That is lovely energy. [message received noise] [crowd laughs] Id send her this. Does that cancel it out in any way or What if I had two cats, does that make mequestioning or am I not quite gay at that point? Ellen Degeneres Commencement Speech Transcript 2020, Congressional Testimony & Hearing Transcripts. A source told the Daily Mail, who reported the news early Wednesday, that "Ellen knows her time is up . Ellen Degeneres: (04:32) FOX Image Collection via Getty Images. March 16, 2022. Call me Big Daddy when you back that ass up She took a chance on me. Take a left at the gift shop, and that is the front door. I think people have a tendency We look atsomebody and we decide we know all aboutthem. "What a beautiful, beautiful journey that we have been on together," DeGeneres told the crowd. Ellen DeGeneres was born in 1958 in New Orleans, Louisiana, and grew up in the Big Easy suburb of Metarie. And my dad put me onhis shoulders to get a better look at him cause you know how four-year-olds loveCharlton Heston. Cut to you, sitting at a bar, drunk, in the same outfit the entire time. That was big of her, so yeah. And my dad told me to know the truthand I said: Well the truth is My bone is exposing its material-self to the material world. We do We have a tendency to stereotype people. Like: What was my choice? Im pretty sure that, you know -Doctor, sometimes I worry -Ive heardenough. Theres no reason to change them really when they dont get dirty. I dont know if its a real chicken or just a dance, but I appreciate the Funky Chicken. I went to a gas station to put gas in my car And theres a group of teenageboys across the way and theyre like really cool. The place with all the words? Easily integrate Rev using our robust APIs to start building your product quickly. Now, its still on the wrong side because Ive just pulled around. Girl, you looks good, wont you back that ass up I dont wanna stop you. No ones gonna watch a lesbian duringthe day.. No, I mean it, its good material. I think youre doing a great job. I can't move right now. In the end, everything will be all right. So I was having pain in my thirdand fourthtoe. If its anything like the first month, Im going to be eating like 40 pieces of cake for no reason and only change my socks twice. Flatten it out. Do you know what Im saying? I had to learn about it on the commercial. Im bringing back some classic punchlines this week. I dont know, I just guessed. Ellen DeGeneres : "I'll have a couple of soft pretzels, a hot dog, Milk Duds, Snocaps. Ill wanna have a poncho on. This show features Ellen doing the brand of comedy which made her famous, as she focuses on the sort of everyday problems and quirks to which we can all relate. If youre graduating high school, congratulations. -Yes one in the hand is worth two in the bush. Why do you call it the hand? Happy birthday But you know, to find the mountain gorillas they live in the mountains and they are in the jungle in the mountains. Fine dining. -Hows the dining? Dave Chappelle talks about Kanye West, the 2022 midterm elections and Donald Trump. I love that expression. Mazel tov. Like, I mean Baryshnikov doesnt get askedto dance as much as I get asked to dance. Garrett, who appears to have since deleted the tweet in question, appeared on The Ellen DeGeneres Show six times between 2004 and 2007. If you go home, we all have the same stuff in our junk drawer. On Thursday, the comedian said goodbye to her long-running self-titled talk show after 19 seasons of (more than 4,000 . That Im not a dancer. Ellen's show experienced a hiatus from mid-December 2020 to mid-January 2021. tWitch: (08:14) -Well, that comeswith Parmesan cheese. We didnt have a six but we hada nine and a half. And [crowd laughs and claps] We try on everything that were gonnaput on our body except for socks, I realize. We all have For some reason we wont throw a rubber band away There are tons of rubber bands like 24 rubber bands are in there, like in case, a bunch of little girls come over for pigtails one day. 0:50. Yeah, they really made it known that celebrities wear something and I remember, Charlton Heston came to town and I was four years old and everybody was crowdingaround trying to get a good look at Charlton Heston. Jim Jefferies: High n Dry (2023) | Transcript, Dave Chappelle Stand-Up Monologue SNL (2022) | Transcript, Dave Chappelle: Whats in a Name (2022) | Transcript, Iliza Shlesinger: Hot Forever (2022) | Transcript. We use cookies on our website to give you the most relevant experience by remembering your preferences and repeat visits. I dont know if thats true. millionaire | 15K views, 250 likes, 55 loves, 35 comments, 8 shares, Facebook Watch Videos from Ellen DeGeneres: I bet each one of these kids is a millionaire by now. You know what I mean You know what I mean, yeah. He was like the Harry Styles of 1979. The Ellen DeGeneres Show features a recurring segment, called "Cash for Kindness," that spreads good cheer by lying to people. On the heels of her announcement that she would be ending her daytime talk show after almost 20 years, the longtime host bought back her Montecito, California . I will, yeah. Got birds and Im runnin, yeah, bout a hundred, yeah I dont know, I For a while there, I was Every time I looked at the clock it was 11:11 and every time, and I started wondering, like, what does this mean? The important thing is that youve studied incredibly hard to get to this day. If you look at the commercials that areon the air, most every commercial is forsome type of medicine, some kind of pill and I dont knowif youve noticed it the medicine commercials The side effectsare so long that the people on the commercial are running out of activities. You buy a ladder when youre an adult. Theres a key and you dont know what its to. El libro esta en la biblioteca. And Im gonna do that with my finger for a while because, I dont wanna judge. DeGeneres sent an email to staffers at "The Ellen DeGeneres Show" on. Its not important. And this side of the table? Girl, you looks good, wont you back that ass up I mean People werent talking about dandruff. Ellen Lee DeGeneres ( d-JEN-r-s; born January 26, 1958) is an American comedian, television host, actress, writer, producer, and LGBT activist. But it was the best part of my journey. I dont need anything. I That could be right for you. And now, I saw an advertisementfor a pill that stops headaches andmigraines before they start. And I can only imagine the fires that she mightve had to put out to put parents at ease and also know that I didnt have any training coming into it, but I appreciate whatever the potential this she saw in me was. They dont. This hour-long special focused on everyday situations, as DeGeneres put it: modern life and other inconveniences. Help me. And then I passed out. Youse a fine motherfucker, wont you back that ass up If DeGeneres makes roughly $50 million per year for The Ellen DeGeneres Show, and we know each season has an average of 174 episodes, that means DeGeneres earns about $287,356 per episode. I roll it real tight. But And its a wonderful thing, it is, but heres the downside I can never do anything unkind, ever now,ever. I didnt graduate college. Got birds and Im runnin, yeah, bout a hundred, yeah The "Ellen DeGeneres Show" is currently in its 18th season and will end after Season 19. You leave the bathroom to go back to yourtable. They stabbed at it with their sword. Oh. And it had been the whole time. Every single thing, he remembered. We all have our things that we do, that kind of doesnt make sense. Maam. And anyway. Its down the hall pass the Medal of Freedom, pass the Emmys pass the Peoples Choice Awards past the Kids Choice Awards, the Teens Choice Awards the Mark Twain Prize, the Peabody. I had a successful sitcom. I went on safari and I looked like I should have been on safari. Ellen Degeneres: (03:17) Why do you say that to her?. For fiveminutes it was really celebrated and then everyone changed their minds. There was a woman trying to get on theplane with a peacock the other day. Ellen DeGeneres is going home, again. Got your eye on any good medication you want to tell me about? Im And Im kind, Im a good person. I'm bringing back some classic punchlines this week. Ellen Degeneres: (07:36) You know. [crowd laughs] How did you get in here, anyway?" Yeah . Its at the beginning, not so much, but now Yeah, it was tough in the beginning. Translated on-screen subtitles for videos. You also have the option to opt-out of these cookies. You know, how people are, and I said: I gotta get going. Ellen Degeneres: (02:51) She has won 30 Emmys, 20 People's Choice Awards (more than any other person), and numerous other awards for her work and charitable efforts. Fair use is permitted by copyright statute that might otherwise be infringing. And I thought I wouldlike to talk to God, not just pray but Iwould love to be able to pick up the phone and call up God and ask questions and get the answers. Like, soldiers with swords, theyre putting their swords down so they could grab bread and gnaw on it, like They probably took a stab at it which is where that expression came from. If you dont know, one had roast beef and the other had none. [background song playing] -Thats well done! You know, theyll be like: I dont know if I should be in this relationship. Ellen Degeneres: (08:17) I sure do like her. Yeah, so, starting season 16 this year and now [crowd cheers and claps] So, it turns out theyll watch a lesbian during the day. And where are my softball coaches at? If you wanna see how happy I am, if youll zoom in on my fist there. Thank you. Ill tell you that. She opens the show with an obligatory . But if thats your song when youre 30, its still your song when youre 85. During the fourth season of Ellen in 1997, she came out as a lesbian in an appearance on The Oprah Winfrey Show. Ill tell you. -It is? USA TODAY. The best shoe for you to wear is a cowboyboot. I said: Yes, thats what I wear. He goes: Thats the wrong kind of shoe foryou. OK. There was this one station manager, and this is a quote: No ones gonna watch it. You have nice feet. Yeah. Hey, Ive got a joke for you. . Get a weekly digest of the weeks most important transcripts in your inbox. I mean [crowd laughs] Its about winning. Im slicing it. [crowd laughs] How did you get in here, anyway? Yeah, I cant, When Im in traffic, heres the thing. Im trying to do What he do, with raise the roof? Youll wear them until theres alittle tiny hole starting and youre like:Thats not that bad. Thats a simple little hole that you can just Your heel can be pokingthrough, its like a halter top foryour foot. You know what I mean? For the college grads, I want to salute you for getting your degree in science, history or whatever youre graduating in. You were helping us for a minute there. I was vegan for 8 years and I really do believe that is great for you. Transcripts & captions for a better media workflow. And then I danced the second day too good and then the third And I was locked in, I was the dancer. We should be on our own path. I was like [crowd laughs] I was on Aspirin a lot. You dont buy a ladder when youre a teenager. You know [crowd laughs] I dont know what the requirements are to get an emotional support animal but Idont think they are too tough to Its the same doctor that prescribesmedical marijuana. I got a TV from the gay lady. I dont like to waste food. Listen to the MP3 Audio here: Ellen DeGeneres' 2009 Commencement Speech at Tulane University TRANSCRIPT: Scott Cowen - 14th President, Tulane University

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